Many of us gals are self-sufficient, independent and already whole. This means that a man is not what completes us. But in the grand scheme of things, a man pays close attention to certain things about a woman when he is ready to settle down. One of those traits is her independence. Most good men will want to be the one to take care of his woman, but for the most part, he also wants her to bring something to the table too, in one form or the other. Of course, men look for beauty, intelligence, honesty, loyalty and kindness, but all of those things don’t pay the bills.

Too Needy

OK, on a serious note, though, a woman who is needy is a big turn off for a man. Ladies, don’t let the man think you are too needy or you will lose him. A woman who shows desperation is not attractive to a man. It will take a toll on the man after a while. Gals, you don’t want to give a man that kind of control over you, do you?

A Woman’s Independence

Some men tend to be insecure and intimidated when it comes to a woman’s independence, but for the most part, many men embrace it as long as it doesn’t make him feel inferior to her. The woman’s independence should complement the relationship and not over burden it. You don’t want the man to feel uncomfortable. So gals, don’t appear overly confident or act as if you want to be in control. Your self-reliance can be a great quality, but if you overuse it, you can make it come off as a negative thing. You don’t want the man to feel that he is in the battle of the sexes by being fiercely independent. Tone it down a little. Let the guy first prove that he can be the perfect partner.


By all means, you should show your self-sufficiency – not just for the man, but for yourself. You don’t have to impress him if you are already self-sufficient. He wants to see that. No man wants a clingy woman. It will make him feel as if you are suffocating him. Keep a separate life apart from him, which means if he wants to hang with his buddies, have a girl’s night out to show him that you know how to have fun too. He will find that very attractive.

Self Confidence

Your self-confidence should show in how you carry yourself. If you think you are a diva, make no apologies for it. You know you look good, let it show in your confidence. A man will gravitate towards an independently confident woman. Again, your self-confidence will show your independence and dispel any neediness that would turn him off. Use positive body language. Stand up tall, smile and make eye contact. Of course, women are emotional, but don’t wear it on your sleeves. He will freak out.


Men look for a woman who knows how she is. He doesn’t have to define her. In other words, she already has it together. Let us hear how you feel about this topic by leaving your comments below.